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Endorphin Lifestyle: maximizing healthy pleasure

Our pituitary glands and hypothalamus contain 20 brain hormones, collectively called "endorphins." Released into our blood stream they provide us with a euphoric feeling that annihilates stress, depression, and chronic pain, thereby delaying the aging process.

Several drugs (opium, morphine, and cocaine) are endorphin-releasers; "endorphin" actually means "internal morphine."  Luckily, there’s also numerous "natural" ways to release endorphins, with no dangerous side effects. Here’s a list:

1) Long, intense cardiovascular exercise, such as swimming or running
2) Laughter, smiling
3) Having a positive attitude, enthusiasm, cheerfulness
4) Spicy food, like chili peppers, horseradish, wasabi
5) Dark Chocolate
6) Acupuncture
7) Listening to beautiful, calming music
8) Watching scary movies — the stress activates endorphin release
9) Getting yourself terrified on a roller coaster
10) Meditation
11) Massage
12) Yoga
13) Sex  — orgasms release endorphins
14) Viewing beautiful art
15) Sunshine
16) Crying, expressing emotion
17) Going barefoot, being naked
18) Smelling flowers, cooking food, activities that incorporate smell
19) Gossiping
20) Walking in Nature

Performing several of these activities simultaneously should produce huge quantities of endorphins.  Some are simple, easy and safe, for example:

Walking naked in nature, smelling flowers & nibbling dark chocolate
Having yogic sex while watching a horror movie
Gossiping on a roller coaster in the sunshine
Weeping during a massage while listening to Mozart

Other combinations are more challenging, but extremely time-efficient, such as:

Skinny-dipping in blazing heat, skewered with acupuncture needles, as you laugh-and-cry, chomp on horseradish & masturbate

My advice is to provide yourself with a healthy, hedonistic dose of endorphins twice a day – its fabulous for both the body and mind.  If you successfully develop any ecstatic combinations that you wish to publicize, email: hankhyena1@gmail.com

7 Responses

  1. A says:

    all i can think of is genghis khan smelling flowers now. thanks. nyaaan.

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